I've stared at a blinking cursor and a blank page a lot these past few days. Grief and joy has an unexpected way of weaving itself together in the midst of tragedy. Maybe that's God's grace. Maybe that's the supernatural hope He gives us when we don't know how to feel. I've wrestled with not saying something and saying too much. With feeling guilty for unexplainable joy and wrestling through the lurking sadness. When Daddy called to tell me I was shocked and really just lost for words. And then, I didn't talk about it. Because how do you say, my cousin was killed in a car accident and not make everyone around you feel awkward about not knowing how to feel around you? Grief is hard. Unexpected loss is hard. Sure, life goes on, but the achey, unsure feeling that you have in your heart doesn't really go away. Yesterday our family gathered with hundreds of Ryan's friends, co-workers, extended family members, and friends of friends of friends. Our little country church was packed to the brim with people sitting on the floor, in hallways, and outside. Just to be near. To remind everyone that his life mattered and we all cared. Ryan believed in Jesus and had a relationship with Him and that's what gives me hope. It makes the lingering in all the feelings and uncertainties a little less. Because somewhere deep inside I know that God is still God and He's still good.
Happy snow day from #firesidedrive!! Snow days used to be my favorite thing ever as a little girl! My family lived in the middle of no where on top of a hill surrounded by woods and nothing else for miles. So when it snowed, my sister and I would play outside for hours like we were in our own little snow globe. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ When we were done playing, we'd come inside, shed all of our layers, and then find the biggest, snuggliest blanket and curl up on the couch with a cup of hot cocoa or lipton's noodle soup (did anyone else eat this?! #sodiumoverload). Then we'd watch hours of Full House or Gilmore Girls or whatever was on the Disney Channel - #thosewerethedays. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Today has looked like a busy computer work day, but I still convinced Ty to run outside and take a picture in our backyard in good 'ole suburbia. It's a little less snow globesque with all the houses so close. BUT, the snow on the trees 👌🏻 ...kinda looks like one if you squint. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Did you have a go to #snowday tradition growing up? #herrintonadventure